Men are, after all, the ones who do the work, the ones who are expected to provide, to take the risks, to bear the hardest physical burdens. It is not men who force this system onto women, but women who use what ostensibly seems a subordinate position to subjugate men. Where she diverges from most feminism and probably why she drew so much criticism is where she places the primary blame. The general notion that the traditions of paternalism and chivalry are in fact negative and destructive to adult relationships is also in keeping with general feminist views. She takes a basically constructionist, non-essentialist view that women are not born with this attitude but are taught.
While this idea will immediately make most feminists (like myself) gag, quite a bit of what Vilar presents meshes with most feminism, and Vilar has identified herself as a feminist.
The basic gist of her thesis is that women are parasites, manipulating men into doing the work for them, so they can live free of worry in domestic wastefulness. To her credit, Vilar is a clear, articulate writer, good at conveying her points and only a chore to read when she hammers at them too much. In the intro written 35 years after its first publication, Vilar calls the book “a pamphlet,” which I find an accurate description for a thin polemic that often verges on extended rant. But the book seems to have developed a small following within the men’s movement and the darker recesses of what is often called the “manosphere.” Over time, like so many books popular in their own age, the notoriety has dwindled. Vilar appeared on TV programs like the Tonight Show and drew the ire of feminists like Alice Schwarzer.
Originally published in 1971, during the height of the Women’s Movement, this book was actually quite popular and controversial in its day.
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